I rarely visit this website nowadays (that's not really news, I haven't been active since '11 or '12), but this place keeps drawing me back for some reason. I like to check on all the old age Madness animators who used to be active back in '08-'09. It's interesting to see how their life has progressed and if they're still active on this website. I don't know... Newgrounds holds a very special place in my heart. The Madness community inspired me to animate at a young age, and all the memories of starting new projects, scrapping them, starting new ones again etc... I don't know, there was something magical about that time in my life.
I find myself nostalgic about 2008-2009 & wishing I could go back to that time. The passion I had for animating (even though I wasn't good at it) and trying my absolute hardest to fit into the community. And just life in general, really. I feel like I had a whole different kind of energy back then as a kid.
Now everything seems gloomy & stressful. Depression and anxiety is slowly taking over my life. I haven't felt truly happy in a very long time. I don't really have anyone to talk about this with. Don't get me wrong, I have friends and I love them to death. But they wouldn't understand. I don't want to burden them with my feelings, and even though they might be supportive at first, there's always a breaking point where you don't really want to associate with someone who cries to you all the time.
It's crazy how much life changes. I used to be a kid who wanted to become a professional Madness Combat animator & game designer. Now I'm a 20 year old guy with no clear direction in life. I'm being molded by society into becoming an uncreative, dull person who works a typical 9-5 job.
I don't really think anyone's going to read this. Given the lack of activity on my part, it wouldn't surprise me at all. But in the off-chance that anyone stumbles upon this text: thank you so much for reading. It means a lot to me getting this all off my chest.
Before I go
I have a few animated tests that I want to show you. They're nothing special. Most of them are pretty old. But I do want to show you guys that I've been somewhat active even if I haven't been active here. I hope you guys like them.
If you want to contact me or see what I've been up to these past few years, here are some links to websites that I am active on daily...
YouTube - http://youtube.com/user/ludabaws
Twitter - https://twitter.com/LudaBaws
Thank you guys for everything...
In the slight chance that anyone out there is wondering where the hell I am, I've been working on my YouTube channel.
Go check it out if you're interested: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5gRoRYi-bznmdhY5lY55XA
(Will most likely be making more frequent animations on my channel, so if you're interested in that kinda stuff, consider subscribing)
Doing pretty good so far.
I've done 3 scenes with plenty of animation and one death-scene.
Will keep you guys updated if interested!
I remember back in 2007 when I was around 11-12 years old and I would lie to Newgrounds about being 13 - and above, otherwise I couldn't sign up to this website.
I'm turning 19 soon...
...very depressing, somehow.
Where is everyone? All the people I used to know on this website, it feels like they are long gone. If you read this, please comment to let me know that you're still here...
I'd love to just connect with you guys, even though that I don't come around here often. :-)
Do people still do it like they used to back in 2009/2010? 'Cause I'd love to get back into animating it, again...
Got STEAM? If so, then add me: Luddemars18.
I have games... Lots and lots of games.
All the friends... Everyone... They seem to be gone.
Or am I just paranoid?